(Fiction) “I love you.”

9 05 2014

(A little continuation of my “Six Word Story”)

 

“I love you.”

For a moment, you thought about responding with “I love you too,” or some other affectionate response.

But that would have been a lie.

You stopped loving him months before then. Telling him otherwise would have felt wrong.

So you thought the best response to this sudden declaration of love was to say nothing at all.

Instead, you left.

You left the room, you left his life, you left him out of yours.

You left both of you to wonder what “I love you” really meant, and what you should have said to him.





Six-Word Story

29 04 2014

“I love you.”

I ignored him.

(For today’s prompt on The Daily Post: http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_writing_challenge/flash-fiction/)





Why I blog

11 04 2011

I know the title to this post is terrible. “Laura, you haven’t updated this damn thing in almost two years! Why change your mind now?

Well, there’s the obvious – it’s my homework. Anyone reading this blog is being subjected into my ENG 401 homework. Congratulations.

There’s also the thought of why I blog, which came up in class on March 28th, and as I read Mary Gray’s piece, “From Websites to Wal-Mart” (featured in LGBT Identity and Online New Media).

There are plenty of reasons why I don’t blog. Schoolwork is more important. There’s not enough time in the day. When I do have free time, I spend it on OUTsource/UK GSA-related stuff, or waste time on Facebook, Twitter, or in other corners of the vast Internet. There’s also, of course, the idea that nobody is interested in what I have to say.

Then why do I blog?

Because it’s the only public space where I can comfortably express my thoughts and feelings. I often use Twitter, but can only express words in less than 140 characters. I’m very open around the local LGBT community, but only about 50 people may hear me. Facebook is definitely not the right place, because I’m a) out as bisexual to a limited number of people, and b) there are people on there (church friends, some high school friends, and less-approving relatives) who (I fear) may judge me. This also makes discussing these ideas with people, outside the LGBT community, out of the question.

Can I just delete the “haters”? Perhaps. The people I’m closest to on Facebook are the ones who know everything about me – or at least, they know that I’m involved with the LGBT community at UK. However, I feel like I can’t simply delete people who might judge me. Most of us have been there – you delete a Facebook friend, go somewhere, and run into that person. You stop and chat, and they’ll either say “I’ll talk to you” or “I’ll add you on Facebook!” Yeah. Almost everyone is aware that deleting a friend on FB is not equal to deleting them in real life.

Even though I’m an active member of the gay community (I volunteer with OUTsource, serve as a UK Gay-Straight Alliance officer, help with an LGBT radio (outloud! Queer Student Radio) and recently helped protest against hate preachers on campus), yet I’m afraid of what people would say if they knew that I was involved the community, that most of my friends are gay, or that I’m bisexual myself. I feel like I have to contain myself within certain areas, of both real life, and the internet.

With blogging, I can express my feelings without the fear of being judged. Sure, some of the world’s more ignorant people may stumble on this blog, and may make rude comments (thankfully this hasn’t happened yet), but I shouldn’t be worried – I don’t know these people!

I guess I have more of a problem with motivating myself to write than having something to say.





Yet again…

4 11 2009

Yet again… Once again, my rights, and those of my closest friends, have been put up to a popular vote. And, yet again, slightly more than half of those votes took those rights away in a single night.

Yet again, somebody tried to decide that two fathers, or two mothers, couldn’t have a legal family, simply because the parents are the same gender.

Yet again, somebody saw an ad on TV, telling them that their children would be told about “homosexual marriage” in school if a law wasn’t repealed. Worst of all…they listened.

Yet again, somebody, in a state miles away from my own, said that the greatest friend I’ll ever had couldn’t marry his boyfriend, or anyone else he chooses. Or my friends at UK GSA and beyond couldn’t marry their own lovers some day. Or I couldn’t marry a woman, if that happens to be the gender of my (future, as I currently don’t have one) lover.

Yet again, somebody used what their pastor or someone told them to justify that my rights are wrong. Somebody said that a passage, which also said not to eat shellfish or shave, was enough to say I couldn’t love whoever I pleased.

Yet again, somebody used the word of God, who should be the same as my own, to say that he would condemn anyone who wished to engage in such a marriage, or love whoever they please, to the depths of Hell.

….

Yet again…I have to tell them how much I disagree.

Yet again, I’m forced to tell everyone that my “condition,” my “lifestyle” isn’t temporary or a phase. Yes, I might marry a man one day…but I don’t even know who he is.

All I know is I won’t marry him (if “him” is…well, a “him”) until my friends can too. And to those of you who believe your God would want you to vote on someone else’s rights…I have a God too. Who wouldn’t have created “those damned homosexuals” just for them to be discriminated against. Who wouldn’t have made us to love whoever we want, gay or straight, just so someone can say they “chose” to be that way, or that something is wrong with them, or the way God created them.

I’ll say more about this later, but let me tell you that God loves love. He loves everyone He created on Earth…otherwise, we obviously wouldn’t be here.

And chances are very likely, if you believe in God, then He’s the same one as mine. And if that is really the case, then you should love love too.





‘Coming Out Day’ Has Something For Everyone

8 10 2009

(Cross-posted on my UK blog; a bit more formal than my other posts, since it was originally posted for UK’s Kentucky Kernel…if it’s still being printed, I don’t know 😦   New post relating to the official Coming Out Day will be up soon)

Whether you’re gay or straight, a supportive ally or just wondering what’s going on, you are invited to attend the UK Gay-Straight Alliance’s Coming Out Day this Friday, October 9th, from 10 AM to 4 PM.

The celebration will take place on the Student Center Patio (in front of the Cat’s Den). There will be music, face painting, a bake sale, trivia, an ally pledge, a door to ‘come out’ of, and t-shirt raffles. Please be sure to wear red on Friday to show your support.

UK GSA’s event coincides with the national Coming Out Day, held every October 11th, which falls on a Sunday this year. Both events celebrate LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) people, and their freedom to express their sexual identities, as well as the allies who support them.

The UK GSA, founded in 2006, is a non-partisan organization dedicated to forming a positive environment for LGBT students on campus, as well as raising awareness in the Lexington area.

For more information about the event or UK GSA, please contact: Watson Harding (watson.harding@uky.edu), or Matt Layson (malays2@uky.edu).





Any Questions?

22 09 2009

(This is sort of a preview to a much longer, rant-based post…which I’ve been trying to write for nearly two months without much luck. Will be up soon? I hope so…but you might not)

Yes, I do have a question…

So yesterday at church, you gave us a talk about sex. While talking to us about sex (and resorting to every abstinence-until-marriage argument that you had without bringing out Derek the Abstinence Clown (http://tinyurl.com/8scly2)), you decided to mention that same-sex attraction is, in fact, not a sin; it only falls into the “homosexuality” category when they choose to have sex.

Now…obviously this would be illegal/sinful no matter what, as LGBT couples can’t get married in Kentucky…but what if they were? Would a gay married couple still be considered sin if they decided to wait until after they were married to “do it”?

By the sounds of it, to you, homosexuality is only considered a sin because gay people can’t get married (in most states). Now if things were different…





(Personal Rant) How Am I Doing Today?

15 09 2009

Well…

I left my $10 coffee mug in my Literature class…

I forgot to bring my paper for my Imaginative Writing course to the computer lab during my break, so I had to run to my dorm later to type it up…

I still need to finish up some stuff for said class, and aren’t feeling inspired…

Was on the way to Blazer, when I nearly ran into someone I’m not too fond of right now. I’ve been avoiding this person because he texts me constantly, begging me to hang out when I have other things to do, and otherwise acting like a stalker. He asked why I was acting weird, when I avoided contact (by walking the other way)…hmm, wonder why?

Went to the ATM to realize that I have $40 left in my savings…

Which is partially thanks to not being paid at work, having started halfway through a pay period that was nearly three weeks ago…

Had to explain to a friend that I couldn’t go to his party (again) because I work too late, will feel exhausted afterwards, his house is several blocks from the dorm, and I’d rather not be raped on my way back to South Campus…

Skipped going with my fellow College Dems to Mellow Mushroom after the meeting because A) I was just there on Saturday for my Dad’s birthday, B) had to go finish the aforementioned paper, C) once again, would like to have a safe walk back to South Campus, D) I’ve been feeling pretty anti-social, and E) I have little money remaining, Mellow isn’t taking Plus Account, and I just ate…though that’s not usually a problem…

To top my wonderful day off, my plans to hang out/rant with my best friend in the world have been marred by the fact he just broke up with his boyfriend, after I’ve been cheering on the couple for over a year. The hang-out may still happen, just with more drama from both ends…

So how am I doing today? Pretty shitty, to be honest.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better, seeing that I get to hang out with my best friend, but seeing that he had a crappier day…